


RWBY Jokes

by njmarker13



Category: RWBY
Genre: Bad Puns, Dirty Jokes, F/F, F/M, Jokes, dad jokes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-24
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-10-15 09:27:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17526119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/njmarker13/pseuds/njmarker13
Summary: I did it for Steven Universe, and now I'm doing it for RWBY! Buckle up, 'cause we're flying the Nevermore Express all the way to shitdom.





	1. On the Phone

Neptune: *hanging out with team RWBY* Everyone, quiet! I'm on the phone with my mom! 

Ruby: Tell her I say hi!

Yang: *starts making fake sexual noises while petting Blake from behind her*

Blake: Come on, guys; let him talk to his mom. 

Weiss: EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP! 

RBY: *looks at Weiss in horror*

Weiss: What?

Ruby: You just said a bad word. 

Yang: Yeah, the show's only heard one. 

Blake: When?

Neptune: *goes across the hall to JNPR's room* Can I hang out in here? RWBY's too loud for my phone call home. *goes off hold*

Jaune: Hey, tell her I said hi. 

Pyrrha: *while absent-mindedly stroking Jaune's hair* Oh, come on, he's on the phone! Let him be.

Nora: *behind Ren, holding up and madly waving a sign that says "Love Me!". Starts making loud, sexual noises like Yang did.*

Ren: Nora! He's on the phone!

Neptune: *leaves*


	2. Cooking with Tai

Ruby: Have fun cooking! 

Tai: So, I was helping Oobleck move some baby stuff into the nursery. He had me hire this company called Oaks Rental, so I asked them, "Hey, wood you help me and a fellow sapling out? I don't know if you've branched out into baby things yet, but you're welcome to leaf if you find this offer too sappy!"

Yang: *flips the bacon* Don't go bacon my heart there, Dad, you're simmering these puns too much.

Tai: I couldn't if I fried. 

Weiss: That pun... that pun was waffle!

Yang: You butter believe it!

Tai: Eggcelent comeback, Yang. 

Yang: Don't throw in the yolk just yet. 

Tai: *about to break an egg* What's that one supposed to mean?

Yang: It means don't throw in the yolk just yet. 

Tai: Oh. 

Weiss: *to Ruby* We've made a grave mistake. 

Ruby: *covering her ears and hiding her face* YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW THAT?!


End file.
